Thursday, February 23, 2012

Struck down but not destroyed

     In bible study lately we have been studying 1 and 2 Corinthians. I love the verse that talks about how we are struck down, but not destroyed, persecuted but not abandoned. 2 Corinthians 4:8 says, we are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed. We are perplexed, but not driven to despair. It seems like every where I turn there are so many troubles in this world. This verse gives me comfort. My own little family is so "happy". Truly we are a family that loves deeply, laughs often and blessed in EVERY way. But, anytime I peek my head out of my cocoon I see trouble everywhere. Brelee has a little boy in her kindergarden class that I worry about. His mom is a definite drug addict. I worry for his safety and his spirit. He has siblings that I know are suffering at the hands of those that are supposed to take care of them and love them.  Another little boy in Brelee's class just get sent, along with his family, back to Mexico because they were here illegally. They are scared there because the drug cartel is so rampant.
     A few foster care classes ago they showed a video about a little girl, around 9, being beaten, and then later that night, sexually abused by her dad. It was a 3 minute video but afterward none of us could say a word. There are no words. The teachers told us that we would be seeing kids just like this little girl. Except we will have  to deal with it longer than 3 minutes because these kids will be living in our home.  I still get sick when I think about it. But, I know that I am called to face it. To look at it head on. Too many people turn their heads because it hurts. Recently my friend who attends my fitness camp shared about her thoughts on having 2 foster daughters for the past 2 years. She said many people say to her, "I could never be a foster parent, I would just get too attached". She said that when people say that to her it is insulting. She went on to say that she has feelings too. She gets attached and loves. But, she is an adult with a healthy psyche and she can heal. These children are the ones that need to be able to heal. They have been traumatized in every way and they are literally dying for homes and parents that show them safety and love.  I love the way she put that because I hear that comment a lot to. What I say is that yes it is hard to have a child and know that they could be returned home and taken away from me. But, it isn't about me. It's about that child. My job is to love them while I have them. To pour in who God made them to be. To let them know how loved and special they are. That is the focus.
     I am constantly having to remind myself that my life is not my own. That I was bought with a price. I want to lose my life for God's sake, not try to keep it for my own sake, because I know I will lose it. Luke 9:24 says it best, "for whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it". This scripture is one that I think about daily. God has truly broken my heart for what breaks his. My prayer is that my heart doesn't stay broken because I act out of obedience to change situations. I want to be the hands and feet of God. It seems like such a big task for such a fallen ME! But, I choose to obey. I choose to listen. I choose to act. It is an exciting life. It is a daily and sometimes moment by moment decision to live this way. Keep me accountable to it friends.


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